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08/27/2003: "Jambo, Jumbo!"

Jambo, yes, this is Swahili for Aloha, and Jumbo is my quasi brother-in-law's pseudonym. No, he is not African; in fact he is one of the whitest guys I know, short of an actual albino. But his name is Jim, and his girlfriend, my quasi sister-in-law, is too creative/perverse to call him Jimbo. It's Jumbo. He's gotten used to it, over the years, and he even uses it for an e-mail address. Anyway, not being above torturing people with silly names, I started tossing out the occasional, "Jambo, Jumbo," or using it in the greeting of an e-mail and no reaction. Zippo, deadpan. Click more.. below.

Now, Jumbo is an art history/computer science geek and the hyperactive offspring of two college professors. He can be drunk, stoned, and sleep deprived, but still be extremely dangerous at a Scrabble board. So, I'm reading this lack of reaction as, yeah, you're the first one to think of that, ho hum, when wham, reality strikes. The poor guy has never seen a jungle picture -- "Jambo Bwana," dig it? No Tarzan, the immortal tale's of Edgar Rice Burroughs? Johnny Weissmuller would spin in his grave.

Jumbo was denied, all these years, the opportunity to approch an Afro American programmer from Newark, who is dressed in tribal finery at a party, and break him up with, "jambo, dude." Oh woe is Jumbo!

We work, we play, we laugh, we cry; but, when the house is dark and quiet, and it's late, and we're ripped, we don't watch CNN. Do we?

Jumbo, jambo.

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