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10/07/2003: "Road Warrior"

I've been hiding from the bad news about my car all summer long (click to read about it), and as is usually the case, when you finally get around turning the light on in the closet, there is no bogeyman hiding in the dark after all. Good, it's my bad ass road machine, and holder of the land speed record from Chicago to the Grand Traverse Bay region of Michigan. And as it turns out, it will ride again. Click more.. below.

This fine machine is big and old, and runs like a bad out of hell. It is a 1991, gun-metal gray Chevy Caprice, an unmarked police car I bought in 1996 from a Toyota dealer where my neighbor worked. I bought the car for a song because the mileage was uncertified and, I now believe, based on the performance I've gotten, the car must've been wrecked or the engine blown and replaced. I put a hundred thousand miles on the car myself and it still runs like a two ton sewing machine though the odometer is soon to roll over 200,000 miles. Sweet. So what's the problem?

The problem is, I cuddled with a tree at low speed in July and totally screwed every body part on the passenger side of the car. That's why you have insurance, right? Well, as anyone knows who doesn't want to drive a little tan shit box, it ain't that easy. Since the car was built when Detroit still knew how to build cars, it is old enough to be totally without bluebook value. Oh well. If you want to drive what you like, there is a price to pay. And, it's name is out-of-pocket expense, and it's game is that you have to do some of the work.

First, you have to find a body shop that will work with "junk" parts. Then you have to get on the phone and find those parts, go to the boneyard to look them over, and if they work for you, tote them to the body shop. Jesus, why? Because, General Motors wants $1200 for a full door (with the guts inside), and $470 for a door skin, which is just the outer sheet metal. The boneyard, on the other hand, will provide you with a full door, including glass and rear view mirror, for $100 cash and carry. Once the interior panels are swapped into the doors, fenders are hung, and everything is painted, the results are the same. So, it becomes doable and practical to drive what you like.

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