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11/11/2003: "Pyramids and Nazis"

I pay an extra chunk of change every month to the cable TV company for premium channels. One of those "premium" channels is the History Channel. I don't know how premium cable TV channels get away with running commercials at all, but the History Channel seems to run more commercials than anyone else. And, History Channel advertisers seem to only have a single commercial which they repeat shamelessly. I guess they learned that technique from watching North Korean brainwashing experts on, you guessed it, the History Channel. And, for the advertiser, it has to be hugely cost effective. If History Channel executives don't mind, what the hell? Click more.. below.

Listen, I like the History Channel. I'm a little tired of pyramids and Nazis, but I will put up with a lot of horse shit to see something as cool as the documentary they did on ancient Sparta not too long ago. That was great. And, if you're a World War II buff, some of the battle footage they dredge up can't be beat. But, my friends, there is horse shit, and then there is HORSE SHIT.

I've learned to deal with the excessive commercials breaks, repetition and all, by drinking more, and then going to the bathroom more frequently. I still wish their advertisers had more than one commercial each, but it's not too bad when you only have to hear it from the kitchen or the bathroom. But, now they have added insult to injury. We watch, or at least listen to, their commercials while they screen movie advertising, thinly disguised as documentary material, two days before the release of a new film. Get a load of this:

"How true is Hollywood to history? What are the real stories behind the people and events portrayed in some of the best-known feature films of our time? We take a behind-the-scene look at the epic adventure film "Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World", directed by Peter Weir. Russell Crowe stars as Captain Lucky Jack Aubrey, who sets sail to taste life on the far side of the world, but encounters danger during the Napoleonic Wars. "

This movie hits the theaters November 14, 2003.

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